6 May 2004

conflux: (Default)
I am not saying anything new but here are some of my thoughts.

No one is perfect. We all have our flaws and who is to say what perfection is anyway? So if you think everyone should conform to a set of ideal standards then you are likely to be disappointed. This is one of the reasons I seem to have a problem with fundamentalists or one-true-way-ists of any kind. They have come up with some often fairly arbitrary idea of what they think is the right way to do things and give anyone who disagrees with them a hard time about it.

In my experience most people try their best to do what they think is right. Some people (in my opinion) have a very funny idea of what they think is right and, where I can, a like to challenge their ideas and prejudices and at least get them to think about their choices. Often they are just going by what they have been told to believe rather than thinking through the issues themselves.

There are some people out there who are deliberately unpleasant, usually because they think they can gain something from it. I try and avoid these people and have been known to go to some lengths to get even with them when they have wronged me (by tracking them down and informing the police for instance). Often these people seem to lack any empathy or understanding of other peoples feelings but sometimes they are just nasty to other people anyway and come up with excuses about why they are different from them in some way to justify their actions.

I have been told that I am very excepting of people's flaws. What is closer to the truth is that I try not to prejudge people. I try to find out their reasons for why they do things before making up my mind about what I think about them. Even then I don't expect anyone to be perfect but look at the overall picture. If that makes me seem non-judgmental then fair enough.

Love can make us blind to someone's flaws initially but in my experience if your love for someone is going to last, you have to see the whole person, with their good and bad points, and love them anyway flaws and all. The same is also true of friendship.


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September 2011

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